DOS

It's interesting, if only to me, that parents require their children, especially young adolescents, to make "adult decisions". Since the majority of our "adult decisions" are based on our life's experiences to date, matured with our personal value system, it would seem absurd to expect a 14 year old with such little exposure to the world and all of its potential "landmines" to make very good "adult decisions"

I would rather have my child make "right or wrong" decisions. This is much easier for them to comprehend since they have been making these type of decisons since they were probably 14 months or so old. It is the same system that we have nurtured carefully into their "risk-reward" analysis as they grew. This system is simplistic, easy to navigate in and virtually black and white in its application.

Children need rules even though they may protest loudly as they grow in years. Boundarys allow them to apply the "right-wrong" rule as they venture forward. Children, like most adults, will conform to any set of rules if they don't change constantly. The frustration and irrationale behaviour eminate from different rules-different days or selective rules for special people. As children grow into adulthood, they will transition into "adult decisions" more easily if they have embraced the "right-wrong" concept. They will be better prepared to make intangible decisions based on a core value system which began early in their life as simplistic rules.

Right-wrong also has the benefit of continual and improved communications between the parent or adult and the child as they grow. It creates a fundamental base of agreement between the two parties. The problem before them is either right or wrong. The discussion comes into play as each side attempts to provide support for their perception of the fairness of the decision. No matter where the discussion may venture, ultimately the issue will revert to the "right-wrong" test. In a young adult's mind, this is a playing field leveler. As a by-product, it teaches them logical argument, negoiating tactics and provides the parent with a most desired "teaching moment".